In
2024, I was diagnosed with Adjustment Disorder. At first, the diagnosis felt
unfamiliar and heavy, but over time it became a language. A way to understand
what my mind and body had been trying to communicate for years.
As a psychologist myself, I can sense when something is shifting in my mind and body. I notice the subtle tensions, the racing thoughts, or the fatigue before they fully surface. When life changes faster than the nervous system can heal, these signals become essential clues—reminders that we need space, reflection, and care.
Adjustment
Disorder is a stress-related mental health condition that occurs when the brain
and nervous system struggle to adapt to significant life changes or prolonged
emotional stress. It is not a personal failure. It is not weakness. It is the
result of being human in the face of experiences that require deep and repeated
adjustment.
When
Life Changes Faster Than the Nervous System Can Adapt
My
journey toward this diagnosis did not begin in one moment. It unfolded over
time.
It
began with a complete change of environment: moving to Poland and learning how
to rebuild a sense of stability in a new country, culture, and rhythm of life.
It continued while I was living far from home when my father died in a tragic
accident. Grief experienced at a distance has a particular kind of loneliness
that the body remembers.
Then
also came motherhood. Giving birth to two children is not only a physical
transformation but an emotional and psychological one. It demands constant
adjustment, identity shifts, responsibility deepens, and the nervous system is
asked to stay alert for long periods of time.
Each
of these experiences required strength. And I survived them.
But
survival does not mean the body forgets.
How
Adjustment Disorder Shows Up
Adjustment
Disorder often appears quietly. For me, it showed up as emotional exhaustion,
heightened sensitivity, difficulty focusing, and a constant feeling of being on
edge. My mind understood that life was moving forward, but my nervous system
stayed in survival mode.
Recently,
unresolved stress was triggered again by family circumstances and the untimely
passing of my brother. Grief has a way of reopening stored pain. The nervous
system does not distinguish between past and present loss. It responds to both
as if they are happening now.
This
is the reality of stress-related disorders: the brain learns to protect first
and regulate later.
Choosing
Healing Instead of Silence
I
am not sharing this story to ask for sympathy. I am sharing it to normalize
truth.
It
is okay to say that life-changing events impact mental health. It is okay to
admit that sometimes we are not okay — even when we appear strong, functional,
and capable on the outside.
Seeking
therapy was not a sign that I was breaking down. It was a conscious decision to
take responsibility for my healing. Choosing support, learning how to regulate
my nervous system, and allowing myself to process grief and change was one of
the bravest decisions I have made.
What
deserves more questioning is not therapy but the normalization of mental,
emotional, and sexual abuse that pushes people to the edge of losing themselves
in silence. Healing requires courage. Speaking requires courage. Ending cycles
of harm requires courage.
What
Healing Has Taught Me
Healing
from Adjustment Disorder is not linear. It is not about returning to who I was
before loss, before change, before grief. It is about becoming more aware, more
grounded, and more compassionate with who I am now.
I
have learned to listen to my body instead of judging it. To slow down without
guilt. To set boundaries without apology. To understand that adjustment takes
time especially when life alters you in ways no one prepares you for.
A
Closing Reflection
It
is okay not to be okay sometimes.
And
asking for help is not weakness. It is self-respect.
Healing has also taught me something simple but powerful: kindness changes a lot, and it doesn’t cost much. We never fully know what someone is carrying, the losses they are grieving, the transitions they are navigating, or the quiet battles their nervous system is fighting every day.
A gentle word, patience, empathy, or simply choosing not to judge can make a real difference. Kindness does not fix everything, but it can soften the weight someone is carrying.
If this resonates with you, let this be a reminder: be kind to people. Be kind to yourself. You are not broken, you are responding to life. And healing is not a destination, but a relationship you build with yourself, one honest and compassionate step at a time.
Cheers to those struggling but still living...you are not alone. And to everyone, a gentle reminder: be kind...always.
Much
love,
Aixo
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